Girls, have you ever moved past the ‘honeymoon’ stage and finally realise that your partner is not all the ‘prince charming’ you first thought him out to be? Of course this does not mean you no longer love him, but you are suddenly aware of the little annoying habits he has.
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Newsflash: Guys also experience the same feeling. Here at LOLA, we have interviewed several Singaporean guys to select 7 common pet peeves about their respective partners!
[noun] pet peeve;
something that a particular person finds especially annoying
7) She wears too much makeup
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The meld of cosmetic chemicals and sweat likely to occur in Singapore’s punishing humidity is not a pretty sight for guys. It becomes especially unattractive when a girl wears makeup akin to what stage actors wear. Certainly what is considered too much is really up to debate but tone it down to a ‘natural’ look and save the drama for special occasions.
6) She is insecure
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With the advent of Instagram and legions of attractive, abs-showing, well-proportioned faces of other girls, it is difficult NOT to feel lacking. But to constantly beat oneself up over imperfections is not attractive- not only to guys but people in general. You’re imperfect, as everyone else, but that’s O.K.
5) She reads too much into it
One of our male interviewees recalled how his girlfriend interpreted his “I’m tired” after a long day at work as unfeeling and that he no longer loves her. Don’t read too much into it, if you had a long day you would just want to sleep too. Only worry if he does this every night!
4) She tweets about everything that goes wrong in the relationship
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There have been lot of clichéd debates about social media increasingly becoming a source of friction between couples, which indeed have some merit to them. Social media sites allow uninhibited expression, but such freedom can also be misused. One may argue that it is their right to tweet/ post a status about what they feel and that people can unfollow them if it is annoying. While this is undoubtedly true, remember that social media sites are still public platforms. If you do need to confide in someone, do so privately!
3) She is sarcastic when he doesn’t do certain things
Sarcastic comments such as “I’m sure it’s so difficult for you” for not doing things like picking up clothes from the floor denote implicit aggression and denigration. Elevate your words and cultivate healthier relationship habits for a stronger relationship.
2) She has unrealistic expectations
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If he no longer texts you every hour as he did in the ‘honeymoon’ stage, this does not mean that he no longer cares or think of you. Romance and sweet nothings can be nice to have all the time but expectations are indeed the root of heartache. Be realistic, and put yourself in other people’s shoes- if you can’t fulfil the very expectations you have of him, don’t have them!
1) She doesn’t say why she’s mad
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The top pet peeve from the interviews conducted is the fact that girls do not like to say what bothers them. Granted, nobody likes to be confrontational- it’s unnecessarily disruptive and upsetting. A utopian world would allow guys to know where they went wrong without directly telling them; but until we achieve such a world, verbalise what you feel. Like in other relationships in your life, pick the correct time, place and state of mind when telling him what you feel and ultimately work towards resolving it.
The 7 pet peeves Singaporean guys have about their partners represent the quintessential “don’ts” in a relationship. Yet, this does not mean you put up an act to keep your partner around. Be yourself, but at the same time always try to treat people how you would want people to treat you. A perfect relationship where there are no fights, annoyances and misunderstandings is impossible to achieve but the act of working towards it has, in itself, its own value and benefits!