If there is one thing in this world we girls need to stop doing now, it will be trying to compete with each other in the negative sense of the word. There is nothing wrong with a good, fair, old competition in sports or another good game, but I bet we all have been in the situations where girls compete with each other just for the sake of making the other look bad in the eyes of others (e.g. other friends, a teacher or a boy).
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Seriously, why are we doing this to ourselves? And the weird thing is, most of us don’t try to compete with other boys, but mainly focus on competing with other girls. We probably all have heard or said the sentences ‘Am I prettier than her?’, and ‘As long as I am doing better than her, I am fine with whatever happens’. Is it our own insecurities or are we just mean to each other?
I always felt very uncomfortable in situations like that and never really understood why us girls would do that to each other. I have seen it ruin long term friendships and bonds between sisters and cousins, which is so unnecessary. Of course I have seen this behaviour with myself as well and a couple of years ago I decided to cut out all negative elements in my life which included this kind of behaviour from others but more importantly, from myself.
One of the reasons that we started Career Girl Daily is to empower and encourage ambitious girls from all over the world to believe in themselves, to be the best that you can possibly be and let you guys know that everything is possible.
I love reading about strong women that empower each other and think we girls owe it to each other and ourselves as well. So whenever I am at the crossroad of being mean or being nice, I think of these 5 reasons to go for empowerment instead of tearing someone else down:
Empowering someone else empowers you to
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If there is one thing I learned from motivating other Career Girls is that it empowers you, too. It is not just giving, you receive a lot in return, and I always get even more motivated and inspired from inspiring others. It brings so much positive energy to your life and seeing someone else do good should only motivate and inspire you to do good as well and be happy for the other person.
You never know what the other person has been through
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Advice that I once got from one of my favourite lecturers in Uni. Of course I have been mean to other girls in my life and unfortunately also tried to make other girls look bad in front of others, but we often forget that everyone we meet has something going on in their life, we don’t need to make it any harder for someone else.
A Facebook page that helps me realise that every single day is Humans of New York. I really think this is the best FB page ever made and it just shows that no matter what your background is, no matter how rich or how poor you are, we are all dealing with something. We can’t be friends with everyone and some people are simply not your type of person, but still always be positive and friendly even when you are not friends.
Jealousy only affects you
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And it is bad for your health as well! Jealousy can only poison your friendships and relationships and never did anyone any good. We probably all hate how jealousy makes us feel and therefore it is important to acknowledge when you are jealous of someone. What I always do is take a deep breath and try to let go of that jealous feeling by reminding myself that I should be happy for the other person. 9 out of 10 times it really works and the feeling goes away, and if it doesn’t I still try to force myself to let go of that negative feeling and focus on the happiness of others.
It is not a competition
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No one is getting a medal in the end (achieving something off the back of someone else is NOT winning). The only one you should compete for in life is yourself by progressing every single day. You don’t know the dreams, goals and resources of others, so competing with them is useless and a complete waste of your time. Focus on bettering yourself and achieving your own goals and dreams. If you really focus on your own life, you won’t even have time to compete with others.
The world has enough negativity
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Seriously girls, the world does not need our help in creating more negativity. If you can be the person that makes another human being believe in themselves again, why would you be the one who brings them down even further. You can’t have a positive life without a positive mind and positive minds will never bring anyone down.
By Lois