Last week we talked about why you ladies should make the first move. Now imagine this: You’re out with your friends at a bar or a coffee joint when you spot a gentleman, alone and looking gorgeous. He’s a perfect stranger whose digits you’re aching to acquire. Yet you’re too shy to do anything about it, so you simply admire from a distance.
The next time this happens, choose instead to make your move. Here’s how:
1. Introduce yourself.
Sometimes, these three words can be the toughest thing to say: “Hi, I’m…” If you find yourself stuck and self-conscious, rally a few outgoing friends to approach the gent and get them to initiate the introductions.
2. Start with fun, light conversation.
Go about it as if you’re making a new friend. Small talk can be agonising, but at least try to avoid the “awkward silence”. Struggling? Get a friend to help; preferably get someone who can get a conversation going without drawing too much attention to herself.
3. Make eye contact and smile.
It’s like flirting without saying a word. Looking him in the eye lets him know you’re devoting unadulterated attention to him. Smiling should just be an automatic response. Besides, it makes you look more attractive and amicable.
4. Ask if he’s single.
Instead of diving straight in, be nonchalant about it and casually slip the topic into the conversation. For instance, assume he has a girlfriend and say something along the lines of “I’m sure your girlfriend would…” This will save you time and a broken heart, especially if he’s taken.
5. An eligible bachelor? Flirt a little.
Test the waters! You don’t have to be too forward with flirting. Complimenting him, as in a coy “You’re rebellious” rather than a brazen “You’re hot” is a good way to start. The way he responds can reveal whether he’s interested.
6. Get his number.
Do this when the conversation has reached a comfortable level. End it on a high note and then go for the gold – his digits. There’s no shortcut to this. Don’t be sneaky or dishonest. If it helps, “We should exchange numbers” might feel easier to blurt out than “Can I have your number”.
7. Continue the conversation on the phone.
Keep it casual. Avoid bombarding him with texts a thousand times a day. Space them out, and keep up the teasing. This is the easy part because everyone is more interesting over text than in real life.
8. “Are you free next Saturday?”
The conversation has to eventually go somewhere. Asking if he’s free on a specific date sets you up for the actual “asking out” part. If you go straight into asking him out, and he turns out to be unavailable, the rejection would sting more.
9. If it’s a yes, go ahead and ask him out.
As long as you’ve made it clear that it’s a date, and not a friendly get-together, congratulations, you’ve crossed the finish line and won yourself a spanking date. On the off chance he decides to rebuff the invitation, even after indicating he’s free that day, he’s probably toying with you and quite clearly not worth the pursuit.
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Source: Lunch Click