Life. It is been a hell of a trip. I am not going to lie. And I’m still living and learning, every step of the way.
Marriage is not about the wedding
When I started out 5 years ago, I knew nothing about marriage. I felt I was marrying a guy who loved me, the venue was beautiful, the guest list and small intricate details obsessed over for months before the big day and I had on a nice dress. What could go wrong? Well, actually, a lot.
Credit: Lough Erne Resort
No one really hit me with true realities of marriage. And yes, 5 years of marriage is nothing spectacular, but it is enough time for me to realise I fucked up royally and made really bad choices. So yeah, my advice to you, don’t sweat the wedding … AT ALL… it’s just for show. You focus on the marriage and that will pay dividends far better than any ang pao.
You will be judged when you take the road less travelled
Credit: Video Blocks
… and this is no big deal! It takes a lot of courage to deviate from convention. And it’s a tough route to navigate! It’s only human nature to want validation. To be sure and not make any mistake. We are too scared to fail hence, we follow the same path that everyone suggests/expects, do the same thing everyone does in your situation. But when you finally realize that you are not meant to do what everyone does and that your destiny is different, you follow your heart. Oh man, tongues will wag, gossip will fly, judgement will be passed. But you know what? It’s all by people who don’t matter and shouldn’t matter to you anyway. Meh, take it in your stride, it’s a small price to pay to go with your gut and to blaze your own trail by listening to your heart.
Your friends are not permanent
Credit: Life Without Baby
Very few friends you make in your youth will still be around when you’re 30. And with every milestone you reach… your career, marriage, starting a family… expect to lose more friends. It’s no one’s fault, as you (and your friends) grow, your interests and agendas change, your lifestyles upgrade (or downgrade) and you find yourself needing and being drawn to a different group of friends. Only the very select few will be around until the end. Don’t beat yourself up over friendships you could not maintain.
Money doesn’t solve all problems
Credit: Retail News Asia
Many problems in life won’t be solved by money. Yes, money gives you luxuries and widens your options but important things such as a happy family and genuine friends do not require money.
Your life is dictated by time
Credit: Video Block
Make a mistake, it’s not the end of the world, yes life goes on. But the biggest thing it has cost you that you can never get back is your time. Time is very finite. I wish I didn’t squander a good part of my youth away on bad decisions. Sure, I had my fun but there were other things I could have done with my time that would benefit me more today. Value time, even when you’re at a point in your life where it seems like there’s just so much of it.